Thursday, June 30, 2011
Sunday, June 26, 2011
than it is on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy but remember the bastard’s name.
3. Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.
4. Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.
5. Alcohol does not solve any problem, but then neither does milk.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
|Contribution by Saul Martin|
My husband and I were considering downsizing our home last year after I lost my job due to the bad economy. We love this place, though, and had bought it fully anticipating living here until we retired. We decided to do everything we could to avoid having to get the house up and so I started cutting pennies everywhere we could. I became one of those crazy coupon people and we were saving lots of money on groceries, and we decided to sell one of our cars to help streamline gas and maintenance expenses. I even looked up electricity rates at http://www.shopelectricityratestexas.com/texas-electricity-companies/Texas/T/Tyler/ to see if I could find something better than what we were paying… I did. Now that we have our bills back under control, I'm finally getting out and starting to look for work again. I can't wait to find another fulfilling job and start contributing to the family again. My husband is so wonderful and hasn't complained one time about having to carry the burden of all our bills these last few months.
- No more push '1' for Spanish or '2' for English. No more confusion in American schools that now must contend with over 100 languages that degrade the educational system for American kids. Our overcrowded schools would lose more than two million illegal alien kids at a cost of billions in ESL and free breakfasts and lunches.
- We would lose 500,000 illegal criminal alien inmates at a cost of more than $1.6 billion annually. That includes 15,000 MS-13 gang members who distribute $130 billion in drugs annually would vacate our country.
- Oh my!
Monday, June 13, 2011
Monday, June 6, 2011
After she disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. While
Doing so he asked her,
'Do you know what I am doing?'
'Yes,' she replied, 'You are checking for abrasions or
'That's right,' said the doctor. He then began to fondle her Breasts.
'Do you know what I am doing now?'
'Yes,' she said, 'You are checking for lumps which might indicate Breast cancer.'
'Correct,' replied the shady doctor. Finally, he mounted his
Patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked,
'Do you know what I am doing now?'
'Yes,' she said, 'You're getting syphilis: which is why I came
here in the first place.'
sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the Cowboy
wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet in front of the
sheriff. "Howdy, Stranger." "Howdy, Sheriff."
The cowboy then moved slowly to the back of the horse, lifted his tail
and placed a big kiss on the horse's butt hole. He dropped the horse's
tail, stepped up on the walk, and aimed toward the swinging doors of the
saloon. "Hold on there, Mister," said the Sheriff, "Did I just see what I think
I saw?" "Reckon you did, Sheriff. I got me some powerful chapped lips."
"And does that cure them?" the Sheriff asked.
"Nope...but it keeps me from lickin' 'em."
Saturday, June 4, 2011
I'm sure you have shopped on the internet for sales that make your efforts worth your time. Finding a good sale anywhere, is worth the time and effort involved. As a young parent you really need to conserve as much of your finances as possible. Searching for a sale at buy on diapers.com online can benefit you and keep you from having to go to the store for these items. When babies are sick it's not a good idea to drag them around different stores to get necessary items when you can buy on diapers.com and get the delivered to your home. That's a convenience and young parent can appreciate.
There's a Bright Beginnings on Facebook that you might like to visit and shop for your supplies. Diapers as well as formula are visible with pricing to suit your budget and make your life so much simpler. I noticed there are other supplies you can obtain, for the older child and adult. It gives you a wide range of shopping items and you can get it all done in one place. I suggest finding the right products for your needs and invest while the great sales are there.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really
Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age
and start bragging about it.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know
'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of
You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a
nice change from being young. Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old
Lord, Keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth . . .. .
. . . AMEN! (my daily prayer) Hazel
FRIENDS ARE ANGELS WHO LIFT US TO OUR FEET WHEN OUR WINGS HAVE TROUBLE
REMEMBERING HOW TO FLY
Father, forgive me because I know not what I do.
THREE MEN WERE SITTING DIRECTLY BEHIND THEM.
BECAUSE THEIR HABITS WERE PARTIALLY BLOCKING THE VIEW, THE MEN DECIDED TO BADGER THE NUNS HOPING THAT THEY'D GET ANNOYED ENOUGH TO MOVE TO ANOTHER AREA.
IN A VERY LOUD VOICE, THE FIRST GUY SAID, "I THINK I'M GOING TO MOVE TO UTAH. THERE ARE ONLY 100 NUNS LIVING THERE."
THEN THE SECOND GUY SPOKE UP AND SAID, "I WANT TO GO TO MONTANA. THERE ARE ONLY 5O NUNS LIVING THERE."
THE THIRD GUY SAID, "I WANT TO GO TO IDAHO. THERE ARE ONLY 25 NUNS LIVING THERE."
THE TURNED AROUND, LOOKED AT THE MEN, AND IN A VERY SWEET AND CALM VOICE SAID,
"WHY DON'T YOU GO TO HELL... THERE AREN'T ANY NUNS THERE!"
Too bad you can't say the same thing about priests.
Guest post by Gerard Mcdaniel
I couldn't believe it when my laptop died halfway through my thesis paper last month. And when I say died, I mean it totally conked out and lost all of my work. I'm not quite as panicked as I was back then but it was a lot of work deciding on a new computer when I had so much other stuff going on at the time. I decided to spring for a top-of-the-line model so I wouldn't have to buy another one in just a year and I got all of the extras including virus protection and some photo editing software. I even did some research at wirelessinternetproviders.net and decided to get a mobile Internet connection to make working from home or class easier than it was before. I think I'm getting used to my new machine and luckily I've been able to remember a lot of the main points of my thesis outline. It has been easy re-creating it from scratch but honestly, I feel like it's even better this time than it was before.