Monday, December 31, 2012

Happy New Year

Hey.....you guys............no matter how....f.........g bad it gets............do your darnedest to have a good one.........how ever you have it......have a drink........get laid..........whatever........just do it.......yippee.....2013

A Change?

"Dallas Cowboys", loose again..........and what did you expect? They've lost so many season's to this type of thing..........and surely you didn't expect them to win this time.........I've known for quite awhile, that they are too eaten up with themselves, to play a decent season..... It's been this way for a long time.........Jerry Jones.........just can't find the right team players and coach.........No one is playing as a team..........it's a bunch of show boating for one's self..........I guess that's what making a large income does to people like that.......
"Any man can make mistakes, but only an idiot persists in his error."

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Summer Fun

I can remember getting to go to summer camp during my teens.  It was a time to interact with other teens from different parts of the State.  I find that today is no different and you can get teensummercamps.com summer camps   information for the coming year.  Parents can help you decide the type to enroll for.  Get more information about the summer camps in your areas.

3.jpg aging image ldyyankee

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Tell It.........Maxine....

This is the best analogy yet
Leave it to Maxine to come up with solution For the mess that America is now in economically.
I bought a bird feeder. I hung It on
my back porch and filled
It with seed. What a beauty of
A bird feeder it was, as I filled it ,
Lovingly with seed. Within a week we
had hundreds of birds
Taking advantage of the
Continuous flow of free and
Easily accessible food.

But then the birds started
Building nests in the boards
Of the patio, above the table,
And next to the barbecue.

Then came the poop. It was
Everywhere: on the patio tile,
The chairs, the table ..

Then some of the birds
Turned mean. They would
Dive bomb me and try to
Peck me even though I had
Fed them out of my own

And other birds were
Boisterous and loud. They
Sat on the feeder and
Squawked and screamed at
All hours of the day and night
And demanded that I fill it
When it got low on food.

After a while, I couldn't even
Sit on my own back porch
Anymore. So I took down the
Bird feeder and in three days
The birds were gone. I cleaned
Up their mess and took down
The many nests they had built
All over the patio.

Soon, the back yard was like
It used to be ..... Quiet, serene....
And no one demanding their
Rights to a free meal.

Now let's see.
Our government gives out
Free food, subsidized housing,
Free medical care and free
Education, and allows anyone
Born here to be an automatic

Then the illegal's came by the
Tens of thousands. Suddenly
Our taxes went up to pay for
Free services; small apartments
Are housing 5 families; you
Have to wait 6 hours to be seen
By an emergency room doctor;
Your child's second grade class is
Behind other schools because
Over half the class doesn't speak

Corn Flakes now come in a
Bilingual box; I have to
'press one ' to hear my bank
Talk to me in English, and
People waving flags other
Than 'Old Glory' are
Squawking and screaming
In the streets, demanding
More rights and free liberties.

Just my opinion, but maybe
it's time for the government
To take down the bird feeder.

If you agree, pass it on; if not,
Just continue cleaning up the poop.


Tuesday, November 20, 2012


I found a company that specializes in the engineering, manufacturing, and sales of products that utilize piping, pumps,Delafield hydraulic hose , manifolds, valves, and tubing to move both fluids and gases.  These type of companies hold the key to what moves the world.  Information can be found about many items when you click on the above link in this post.

Monday, November 19, 2012

AWW Man........

Public Nudity Ban Considered in SF
Now they went and spoiled all the fun.  Those people were just trying to have fun, don'tcha know?  LOL, now fun loving people can't watch them and laugh at the funny bodies and things hanging or dangling........!


I found that the AMA's were going to be on last night and therefore I made special plans not to watch it.  At least I missed most of it and was able to see the Dick Clark memorial, and the final few minutes of the program.  I'm not one to go for all the loud "hiphop" stuff, so being old, I left that to the young people.  Watching a DVD helped my bide my time till most of it was over. 

Justin Wins

Entertainer of the Year, went to Justin Beiber, who chose his Mom as a date for the occasion.  How sweet!  You little ladies have another chance at snatching up the pop idol, since his recent breakup with long time girlfriend.


I visited this website and found beautiful pendants made of the  miraculous medal white gold  that is being advertised.  It looks as though the owners of the website are offering pendants that have a religious theme.  Those of you who enjoy wearing a pendant on a chain around your neck will have many to decide from.  This would be a great gift for Christmas.


Here it is only 3 days before "Thanksgiving", where has the time gone.  I can't see there being much going on this year in the way of getting together.  Things have fallen apart where family events are concerned.  Mom & Henry are in the nursing home, the kids are all the country, and my sister isn't cooking this year.  So, I'm not cooking either which leaves finding the only place we remember.  The one we stood in line over an hour last year on Thanksgiving Day, to eat a good meal.  Then we went to the nursing home, visited family and departed for our homes.  Yes, I got full and was miserable the rest of the day, but the day was lacking in what I've always tried to promote.  That's a big house full of family and friends with food all over the tables and barely enough sitting room for all who came.  Yes, things will be different from now on.


A woman walked into the kitchen to find her Husband stalking around with a fly swatter ... "What are you doing?" She asked. "Hunting Flies" He responded. "Oh! Killed any?" She asked.

"Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied. Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell them apart?"

He responded, "3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone."

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Cowboy Win?

What do you think?  Will they win today or loose like they've been doing?  It's been a rough season for the Cowboy's so far.  I keep hoping they will see the light and do what is necessary to finish out the season with some honor.  It's not fun watching your home team give games away, during at the last quarter or last few minutes of the game.  Too many mistakes have taken it's toll on the Cowboy season this year.  Go Cowboys!


Most department stores have taken their "seasonal" items off the shelves and replaced them with the upcoming holiday items.  Still some of the lucky people will need to find good items when they take that holiday vacation to a tropical area.  You can find supplies when you look  here for custom beach towels  and may also get good sale prices.

Postage Going Up

Stamps are going up again.  I can remember when that was considered a bad omen and people would cringe when they heard it.  Today, with all the technology of computers, email and such it no long poses a threat to the people.  Thus you have the Postal Service finding itself in a downhill spiral.
The U.S. Postal Service, which posted a record annual loss of $15.9 billion, decided on the rate increase last month. The rate increase is tied to the rate of overall inflation and will make only a small dent in the mail agency's financial losses.


Looking for a premium, fully-featured, 2 bike, platform-style, hitch-mounted bike rack that has a built in bike repair stand?  I'm sure that you can find what you looking for at the kuat bike racks  website.  I noticed that if you have more than 2 bikes you can purchase add on's, which allow 4 bikes to be in place at one time.


As we all find out very fast.........Money don't grow on trees.  Yet, it's as though children these days think you have everything they need and here they come with their hands out.  I need some money or a loan.  Loan my ass........you never see it again.  If you do, it's only partial payment and there's an excuse why they don't have all of it or they tell you "later".  I chalk it up as gone, once it leaves my hand to theirs.  Like my Grandma told me many times.........Promises are like pie crust..........made to be broken!  End of story!

Saturday, November 17, 2012

It's Time

You can always find a good heater to purchase if you have the funds.  I believe that a good infrared quartz heater  is worth the extra cash, if you compare the BTU's and quality.  If it's time to replace an old heater, then consider shopping at the link in this post for a new heater.  Compare and save.

Cold Feet

I don't like it when cold weather arrives.  My hands and feet become icebergs and I can't seem to get warm enough.  Putting on extra clothes just makes it hard to move around.  If you go into a place that is warm then you start pulling stuff off.  It's just not funny and I guess I could find something to gripe about no matter what season it was.  There you have it!

Hollywood Dopers........

They don't impress me much! Hell, if it had been me they would have thrown the books at me with no bail, and I'd be stuck in that place for 5 years or more.  I don't like people who throw their money around just because they can.  If you do the crime, then you need to do the time, and I feel that they think their money can work wonders for them, even when the chips are down.  So, far they are getting by with the "Hollywood" treatment, and I'm just waiting for them to really pull a good one.  If they get away with crime once, then they go back and do it again, thinking that their lawyer and their money can keep them out.  To, hell with out.....how are they going to get their money and their lawyers to keep them out of the grave?


Bubba is driving down a back road in Alabama ..  
A sign in front of a restaurant reads:
Lobster Tail and Beer
"Lord a'mighty," he says to himself, "Thems my three favorites!"

Sports Awards

You see them all the time at different conference games.  You see them at little league games.  The sports trophys  are an award deemed to make the person or persons stand out as leaders.  I find that it gives a child a feeling of accomplishment.  It's a very special time for these young people when they get something for their efforts.


The guys were all at a deer camp.  No one wanted to room with Bob, because he snored so badly...  They decided it wasn't fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns.
The first guy slept with Bob and comes to breakfast the next morning with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot. They said, "Man, what happened to you?  He said, "Bob snored so loudly, I just sat up and watched him all night."
The next night it was a different guy's turn. In the morning, same thing, hair all standing up, eyes all bloodshot.. They said, "Man, what happened to you? You look awful!  He said, 'Man, that Bob shakes the roof with his snoring. I watched him all night."
The third night was Fred's turn. Fred was a tanned, older cowboy, a man's man.

The next morning he came to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. "Good morning!" he said. They couldn't believe it.  They said, "Man, what happened?"
He said, "Well, we got ready for bed. I went and tucked Bob into bed, patted him on the butt, and kissed him good night.  Bob sat up and watched me all night."

Friday, November 16, 2012


Get out the  karaoke equipment  and set up for a party this weekend.  You know you want to, so get some friends together and have fun.  It's the best way to connect and have a good time.  If you don't have the equipment, then you might want to invest.  Click on the above link and do some shopping.


If your over 50 years of age, here comes the problem, right? You go to an interview, and what happens? You know all too well, what happened, when you get a letter saying, you were “over qualified”, for the position. I’ve been there done that.

Oh they say, they are an equal opportunity employer. Not so, if your not young and just starting out then they don’t want you. They want the dashing young men in the offices. The cute sexy, tailered young ladies, have to be on the front desks, to cater to the executives. Administrative assistant, consists of a well dressed, college professors, with 1 to 2 masters degrees in business administration, under the age of 40.

Bitch, Bitch.......

Hey, I like this blog.........it has all the nice colors for the font's and I can write any way I want too. I'm limited on my other blogs, and it's a pain to have the same font day after day. To me that has no way of showing your expressions, on a daily basis. This free blog, gives that and more. I'm sure the time will come when I convert over to this blog totally.

I'm still enjoying this blog........even though there aren't many who like it's contents......I can still rant and rave.........

Thursday, November 15, 2012


Investments of a lone  silver coin  isn't what you expect for dealer's who enjoy this type of business.
Today, the beauty of a gold or sliver bar lies in its proven ability to diversify investments, protect wealth and preserve one’s purchasing power. As an investment product, you can buy gold and sliver coins that have a currency value. 

Wednesday, November 14, 2012


Prom season is rolling around and soon the young ladies will be searching for that perfect prom dress.  Some of the girls will need a  plus size prom dress 2013  and this link will give you exactly what your looking for.  Click on the link in this post and shop for various sizes as well and designs.

I Say.............

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult four hour surgical procedure.
A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath.
Nurse,' he mumbles, from behind the mask 'Are my testicles black?'
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies 'I don't know,Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body.'
He struggles to ask again, 'Nurse, are my testicles black?'
Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around and around gently. Then, she takes a close look and says, 'No sir, they aren't and I assure you, there's nothing wrong with them, Sir !!'
The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly,
'Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but listen very, very closely.....
' A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s -b a c k ?' 

And Then?

It takes 7 seconds for food to pass from mouth to stomach. A human hair can hold 3 kg. The length of the penis is three times the length of the thumb. Femur is hard as concrete. The woman's heart beats faster than the man. Women blink twice as much as men. We use 300 muscles just to hold our balance when we stand. The woman has read this entire text. The man is still looking at his thumb.


I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, and our bleak future, that I called the Suicide Lifeline and was connected to a call center in Pakistan .   When I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.


Recent weather in the NC areas has reeked havoc on homes and businesses.  Flooding caused terrible damage, leaving many homeless.  For those of you who were fortunate and only sustained water damage,  the  carpet cleaning raleigh nc  might be of service to you. Contact them for an estimated today.


My darn cat doesn't know when she has it good.......I buy her good food and she turns her nose up at it.  This is bad because she will sit an yowl at me, until I either get tire of her and throw her butt out the door for a few minutes, or give her something else.  This gets costly especially when it's a whole can of food just thrown away.  She will go without eating until I give her what she wants.  I waited her out one day just to see how long she would go.


CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
If the bank returns your check marked  "Insufficient Funds," you have to call them and ask if they mean you or them .
Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.

McDonald's is selling the 1/4  'ouncer'.


It was a tough year, but I made it !!!
But not everyone is as lucky as I am......
The economy is so bad that I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

I ordered a burger at McDonald's, and the kid behind the counter asked,  "Can you afford fries with that?"

Tuesday, November 13, 2012


You find all types of awards going to people of distinction for achievements.  Certain fields of employment award a fantasy trophy  to esteemed workers.  I'm sure you will want to check further into what this consists of.  I suggest you go to the website, behind the link posted in this article.  You will get information to help in your endeavor.


Here we go again, with one scandal after another.  I wonder if these people are trying to mimic the show on TV which has some of the same story lines.  The President didn't like McChrystal and so he stepped down, now Petraeus and possibly another leader that stepped in to take over.  It's a mess and who knows what will come of all this crap?  Look out here goes the "stock market" down again, like it did when Clinton was messing around during his term.  I lost money over that stock market fall.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012


Man, I just want to puke, at the way our people have let America down.  It was bad enough the first term and now to have to put up with four more years of his crap?  America, I hope you survive, because things are going to get rough.  WTF were you idiots thinking?

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Damn Clock

Damn Time Change

Here we go again, changing the clocks back.  Wouldn't it be nice if they'd just leave this crap alone?  Now, we really don't know what the actual time is, since it's been changed back and forth so many damn times.  Leaving "well enough" alone isn't in the minds of our official leaders.  It's just a matter of time before they think of something else to screw the common man up.

Oh Man!

Well, I'm sitting here thinking to myself about the time of day the Cowboy game starts.  Now, 7:30pm is something that we all hate, because it makes us stay up later.  Many work tomorrow and this causes them to be later going to bed for the evening.  School children who love to watch the football games, will be cut short because of it being a school night.  It would have been accommodating for the people to schedule the games during the day, like many other times before.  But {oh no!) not this time!

Friday, November 2, 2012


How will the possible voting on Amendment 64 have any status?  As you know this is a bill that would legalize marijuana in the US.  It seems that there are some who would benefit from this but I consider the drug cartels that would run rampant here with even more crime.  While we would be enjoying the free actions, the cartels would be trying to control who was selling to who.  The problem also would come into play that people would be growing their own, leaving the cartels to tough it out as best they could.  So, I say  WTF?

Monday, October 29, 2012

Ghost Boo Nails?

This is a "How To" which shows you the steps to making your nails ready for Halloween.

Will Smith Free Styles

Will Smith freestyles with several people, enjoying himself for a brief time.  This isn't work even though it looks like he is working it out.  Have fun watching this entertaining video.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

NC Bus Sales

There's a bus company in the state of NC that has good deals for buses.  The  church buses for sale  are considered one of the best brands.  You can get new and used buses put parts and service if you need repairs. To consider buying a bus click on the link in this post and see what this company offers.


Damn I'm getting blind.  It's a matter of time before I can get the cataracts out of my eyes.  I just hope they can hold up until then.  I'm trying to make it financially economic on my funds and still get a good operation.  It is my hope that soon everything will be more clear and I'll be able to see without worry.

Friday, October 26, 2012


Single Black Female

This has to be one of the best singles ads ever printed.It is reported to have been listed in the Atlanta Journal.

Love the response this ad got!!

SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cozy winter nights snuggling up by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me...Call (404) 875-6420 and ask for Annie, I'll be waiting.....
page down

Over 150 men found themselves talking to the Atlanta Humane Society.

Oh Really?

What do you remember about this?  How is it that he has been running out government the last 4 years?  What do you think about things we already know about this man?

Thursday, October 18, 2012


It never occurs to people how to treat each other.  You have certain children who are models and others who are pieces of shit.  I say this because I have experience in this subject.  My step children are just that and they could care less how they treat people.  Yet, when all is said and done, you hear them whining about how they wish their lives were different and things were better for them.  They didn't try to do right in the first place and then they want things to be different?  I'm sure everyone has something they wish they had done differently.  To deliberately go and commit crimes against other people, then wish your life was better???? Excuse me???  How in the hell do these damn idiots sleep at night?  A habitual criminal needs to be put away where they can't hurt others or do what seems to be a formed trend for them.  Hey, don't come to me crying, when you went and did the crime.  If you don't want to do the time, then don't do the crime!  Enough said!

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Sign of the Times

Maine, Maryland, Washington, & California
All four states are expected to be carried in November by President Barack Obama, who came out in support of same-sex marriage earlier this year.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Offend You?

If you see something that offends you on this blog, then go to a different blog and read what they have to say.  I hope that this blog is a portion of what most American's believe, even if it is considered to be a bit "redneck".  What can you expect from a true "Texan"?

Oh Yeah

I found this on a website and hope that they don't mind me borrowing it.  I really like it and am sure that many think the way I do..........so, if it's wrong to borrow this, then please forgive me.......

Poor Thing......

I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair; but, by turning to religion, I was soon able to come to terms with the whole thing.  I converted to Islam, and we're stoning her in the morning!

Ha Ha!

The Red Cross just knocked on my door and asked if we could contribute towards the floods in Pakistan.  I said we'd love to, but our garden hose only reaches the driveway.

Who Me?

They say that "home is where the heart is".  Hell you gotta have a heart first?????


The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex with me because she can't afford batteries.

Oh No.....

* A man calls 911 and says "I think my wife is dead".  The operator says, "How do you know?"  The man says, "The sex is about the same, but the ironing is piling up!"


* I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated, but must come back as a different creature.  She said she would like to come back as a cow.  I said, "You obviously haven't been listening."

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Asked For It

Well, I asked for it..........now I got it.  It's so nice to see the rain falling.  I believe it has been 3 or 4 weeks since we've had any here in our area.  Texas has areas that the drought is bad but our North Texas area is considered in a "mild drought".  This is a good thing, because the city has eased up on our watering the yards.  Today, we don't need to water, cause God is watering.  Above is a picture I took this morning of the radar from the Weather Channel website on my computer.

Friday, September 21, 2012


I have a friend who just bought a new pickup and he told me about all the extras he had installed.  He spent at least an extra $4000 just getting things put on it that he wanted.  I wonder if he had a trailer hitch put on it.  I could have directed him to curt hitch  and supply company.  Their website had a wide array of accessories and supplies.


Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.
Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich .
Number 7
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day, teach a person to use the internet and they won't
bother you for weeks.
Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky .. Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to Criticism.
Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?
Number 2
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is Weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
And The Number 1 Thought For 2012 :
We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of Immigration?
" Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers
What you do today, might Burn Your Ass Tomorrow!


Sabotage is one of the best excuses you can have when it comes to fudging on a diet.  I did it to myself many times.  Then I griped about not being able to loose any weight because the sweets beckoned me.  Actually I couldn't admit that I had no will power.  I just spoiled the whole thing and got even larger as time went by.

Yoga Bags

I know that there are things which go with certain exercise programs.  If your into walking then you need a good pair of shoes.  In yoga the mat is something of a necessity to pad your body while posed.  I see some people who have their own mats.  They will need to carry their mat in good sturdy yoga mat bags  as they transport them to different places.  Information about these yoga bags can be found at the link above.

Fishing Story

I went fishing this morning but after a short time I ran out of worms.

Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth. Frogs are good bass bait.
Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bit. So, I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth. His eyes rolled back, he went limp. I released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog. 
A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot. There was that same snake with two frogs in his mouth.
jack daniels bottle

Life is good in the South.


I haven't really delved into the world of yoga and have no idea what type of equipment would be needed.  The website has offered  yoga equipment here  at this link and you can shop for the things you need.  Quality products are needed in any type of exercise or sports.  I suggest looking into this website's equipment if you are interested in yoga.

Election Time

This presidential race is getting down to the final weeks before the actual election in November.  They say that Romney can pull it off but needs to take a different approach.  Obama, is trying to keep his family in the White House for 4 more years.  By that time his girls will be almost grown and he can relax in that big home he got through a questionable deal.  I wonder if Michelle will go back to work once the term is over?


Are you needing a company to supply information about repairing or dying leather?  This website offers Leather Repair Kits in 3 different sizes to accommodate any size repair or recolor possible.  The  nubuck leather   Re-Coloring Kits come with professional grade Leather Cleaner, Leather Hydrating Cream and the highest grade of Aniline Dye available allowing for you to restore the color to your all natural Aniline Leather.

Ya Think?

I Don't Need Anger Management ... You Just Need To Stop Pissing Me Off !  That would help immensely.

Have you ever?

There are so many animals loose in our neighborhood.  I can't put food out doors for may cat because she has to fight just to be able to eat.  The stray cats in the neighborhood, come an fight her on a daily basis and take her food from her.  I've had to start feeding her in the house, which is a problem.  She went to the living room and threw up this morning, right after she ate.  I didn't hear her this time.  Usually I hear her harking before the actual feat.  You can't get animal control to do anything, because the animals are hard to locate and catch.  What to do?

Plastic Printing

There's always a need for plastic cards printing for business cards, membership cards, luggage tags, phone cards, medical identification, insurance I.D., badges, with four color, magnetic encoding stripes, card equipment, accessories and supplies.  You can go to the website and utilize the online quote which is fast and easy to use!

Buffalo Theory

'Well you see, Man, it's like this . . . A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the lowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.

So True

Nominated as the world's best short joke of the year 2008.
A 3 year old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.
'Mom', he asked, 'Are these my brains?'
'Not yet,' she replied.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Big Layaway Giveaway

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Kmart for SocialSpark. All opinions are 100% mine.
I remember a few years ago when you could go to certain stores and place things on layway.  Back then it was hard to find extra cash to buy things.  Money wasn't easy to come by.  Young couples used this process almost every year and many times during the year.  You could have this benefit for when certain high costing items were necessary to be bought.
Today, once again Kmart is offering their customer's free layaway  for the next 3 months to buy their  holiday gifts ahead of time.  It's just one of the many things that Kmart is offering their customer's as an inncentive for their holiday shopping.  It seems that Kmart has come up with a  Kmart's Big Layaway Giveaway  which will give one frees layaway per store away weekly until November 17, 2012.  that in itself is a great promotion, when you consider the other retailers like Walmart, Best Buy and Toys R Us.  The free layaway is a great deal and then you have this to add more fun.  Consider the  Kmart Free Layaway Grid 09_12.jpg and see whether you find the comparison to other retailers as huge.  I see this as being a good time to shop and also have the chance to win my layaway for free.  I can see the lines forming for this  
as I speak.  Why would anyone consider going other places when Kmart has prices that are marked lower than the other places? 

Finding that holiday item will be much easier this year, when you shop for this
at Kmart.  BLG_Logo_Horizontal.jpg (3 documents, 3 total pages)

Visit Sponsor's Site

Wednesday, September 19, 2012


After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target.

Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target:

Dear Mrs. Harris ,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris , are listed below and are
"documented by our video surveillance cameras":

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OHNO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!

15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the fitting room?

And last, but not least:

16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.'

One of the clerks passed out.


When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

Home Alone

Here I sit once again trying to pass the time until the 10pm news comes on the TV.  I have been on this computer most of the day and my butt is growing to the chair.  It's a nice cool evening here in my area of Texas, so I should feel blessed.  It's just me and the cat who is as stand offish as any cat would be.  I get bored easy, so I eat too much.  Thinking about getting a bowl of ice cream right now.

Coffee Maker

Back when I was volunteering for the Red Cross, there were times when I would go and purchase items needed for their active agendas.  It looks as though certain products are just not made to last a long time.  I suppose you would think finding bunn coffee maker parts  would be an easy thing?  Think again.  It took us a very long time just to find a dealer that handled the parts and sales.


Man, I am stuck here in this house for the next few weeks, because of an error I made.  I should have never made the mistake of trusting someone to be a loyal family member.  You just don't realize how a certain person will act until you are in the middle of the situation.  Boy, what a let down I got that fateful night when trying to help my daughter with her problems.  I will never allow myself to be put in a position with her in like manner again.  Enough said.......enough done.......it's a dung deal.


 I know you've seen tee shirts that have certain pictures or statements on the front and back.  These make a statement about what the person wearing it, is feeling or showing at the time.  Getting a  custom tshirt  designed and made is easy in today's world.  All you need to do is find a good silk screen person, with the proper equipment.  Get more information by clicking on the above link.

But Sir...........

If you ever testify in court, you might wish you
could have been as sharp as this policeman. He
was being cross-examined by a defense attorney
during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to
undermine the police officer's credibility...

'Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the

'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person
matching the description of the offender,
running several blocks away.'

'Officer -- who provided this description?'

'The officer who responded to the

'A fellow officer provided the description of
this so-called offender. Do you trust your
fellow officers?'
'Yes, sir. With my life.'

'With your life? Let me ask you this then
officer. Do you have a room where you change
your clothes in preparation for your daily
'Yes sir, we do!'

'And do you have a locker in the room?'

'Yes sir, I do.'

'And do you have a lock on your locker?'

'Yes sir.'

'Now why is it, officer, if you trust your
fellow officers with your life, you find it
necessary to lock your locker in a room you
share with these same officers?'

'You see, sir -- we share the building with the
court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been
known to walk through that room.'

courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a
prompt recess was called. The officer on the
stand has been nominated for this year's 'Best
Comeback' line -- and we think he'll

Feel Stupid?

When people say 'it's always the last place you look'. Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? 

When people say while watching a film 'did you see that?'. No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.


To coin a phrase "don't take any wooden nickels", would be something we once said.  Today, even now you can get decorative coins  designed or made up to suit the occasion.  I've seen political personalities use items like these to give potential voters.  Using these can be beneficial to many.

The Trip

Once again we 3 girls took off to Dallas for a shopping spree.  It's a thing with us to do this and make it a fun day.  Today, we went to several thrift stores in search of items they can resale at a bazaar stall which is opening soon.  This is an area where country people go to shop so, they will be getting it ready very soon.
First of all to start off our day, we find a place to have lunch.  Today, was El Fenix on Buckner Blvd. in Dallas.  I wish I could say it was a great experience, but our food left us feeling as though we had been served leftovers.  Too bad, because it could have been a good lunch otherwise.


Ah, there's nothing like a good get to gather with family and friends.  Good food, jokes, laughter and gathering around the fire later to swap stories.  Men, mostly get off in the other room so they can light up their cigars   and cigarettes while sipping on a good shot of whiskey or such.  You may hear all kinds of remarks from that room.  So, if your one of the proper family members, it's best to go to another part of the house.


Why do people go to a bar to have fun and then get so drunk they can't act right?  I watched this episode unfold the other night, with 3 people who have been in my life for several years.  It was bad to watch them slowly get so drunk that they couldn't control their remarks and actions.  Finally they ended up being miffed with each other and going separate ways, mad.  It's not fun to go and mess up a great evening with friends.

Money Job

 While this job is not one I would relish, I'm sure it's a top quality chance.  You see companies who need such a person to make or break their firm.  As with any job you either need training or experience.  The  Treasury Management training  is one that can help you get the essential information and hands on experience you need for this position.  To get more information click on the above link and see what the criteria may be.

Monday, September 17, 2012


I was reading an article that caught my eye a few minutes ago.  It was telling me that I could put 10 years on my face by applying or using the wrong makeup.  Now, I don't know about you, but I can't afford to add to my years.  I'm too damn old to get much older and that's not something I'm interested in doing.  Making myself look younger would be great though.  Why can't they find a way to help us old girls out on that one?


While shopping for a gift to give my son, I came across the advertisement for  St. Moritz watches  which gave me some idea's.   I'm not able to afford such a nice brand, but there are many out there who can and will.  Christmas is just around the corner and you can find some of the best watches listed at great price's.  Click on the above link and see what you can find.

My Child

She calls me today, wanting to talk to me.  I ask her what's up, figuring that she's wanting something as usual.  She takes the defensive and asks can't she call her mother just to talk?  Well, sure but what does she want to talk about?  Nothing really, just gossip as usual.  Oh well, at least she called and I guess I should consider that a plus.

NC Attorney

Your financial status  can get out of hand when things run sideways on you.  Just when you think life is going great, out of the side of your eye you see this disaster happening.  You need a local attorney to help you.  Living in North Carolina, you will be able to contact a  raleigh creditor rights bankruptcy attorney  to get the needed assistance.  Click on the link in this post and see what's offered.

Woman Loses 76

I was reading where this woman lost 76 pounds eating a diet from your local "Starbucks" of all places?  This is mind boggling, since you would have to be putting out some cash in the process.  Have you seen the price's at this place?  That lady must have had plenty to spend considering the fact she had 3 meals there each day.  Wow, is all I can say.  I suppose if you really want to you can do just about anything.


Having a baby is a time when your body explodes.  At least certain parts get bigger and need larger clothing.  I found that buying a few Maternity Pants  to use for casual wear, helped make for different attire.  Since your only going to need them for about 6 months of baby fat, it's not smart to buy very many.  Information about these items can be found at the above link.


Have you Texans noticed the nice weather we have been having lately?  How great is this, that there is no more triple digit temperatures?  It all comes down to the fact that we are never happy with whatever season we are in the middle of.  We are going to gripe about it and want the next season to hurry up and get here.  The winter, you can keep.  I'm not overly fond of freezing wet wintery cold.

Baby Belly

Have you seen how some women parade around in clothes that show off their big bellies?  It's vulgar as well as outright nasty looking.  Who wants to see a woman who's belly is sticking out, showing what she's done?  Whoopee, she had sex..........so what?  Her and thousands of other women/girls.


1 2 3 Who shot Mr. Lee?  3 4 5 Look at him die.........Mr. Lee, Mr. Lee.......oh Mr. Lee, Mr. Lee, Mr. Lee.....oh Mr. Lee, Mr. Lee.....wa wa wa waaaa........

Hey do you remember that song?


 Here is an item which can be used for various occasions.  You can have  personalized pins  made up for certain companies, events, and other situations.  On certain memorial days for our country or state, I like to wear the flag which denotes my affiliation.  You may consider having some made for your company sales reps.  

Darn Cat

She comes in the room and meows at me.  I ask her what she wants and go to see where she's taking off to.  She stops in front of her feeding bowl, which she has just empties on 20 minutes ago.  No, now this is not going to work.  I'm not feeding her again this soon.  So I ask her if she wants to go outside and open the door for her.  She just sits there and looks off the other way.  Once again I tell her "outside"?  She takes off running to the front room.  Now, I'm pissed and follow her through the house bitching her out the whole way.
I get to the front door, open it and give her a stern "outside".  She takes off out the door, in a scurry doing her best to get out of my way. 

Wedding Photos

When you design a wedding, it becomes a work of art.  The memories are there to carry you through the years.  In North Carolina there is a wedding photographer raleigh  that you can obtain to make your memories last. They will give you several different options from which to choose and you can arrange payment ideas as well.

Liberal Ideas

When you see the most idiotic things happening, you shake your heads and wonder what's next.  The world today as we are experiencing, is just not right.  They've allowed our values to fade into the past.  It's an all out pleasure seeking generation, with no qualms about how they act or who they bother.  Times have certainly changed and I wouldn't consider it for the better.  Hell, has broke loose and there doesn't seem to be a way to stop it.


Here you have a unique product, which carries huge weight and responsibility.  These units are made so specific that they can even give you determinations unthinkable by regular human minds.  The  analytical balance  is a product which can be used in laboratory', hospitals and other scientific fields. It wouldn't take me long to get flustered, just trying to get a good concept of it's abilities.

Royal Photos

The attention on the Royal couple has been tainted with the photos taken by new media.  They certainly aren't allowed to be human, with all the pomp and circumstance they invoke.  Yet, you wonder how they can manage to survive emotionally with all the hype surrounding them?  I realize that the public has interest in the couple and their actions.  It's a matter of hiding away in some secluded place.  Can you tell me who that would be possible?  These people are hounded daily by the new media, as they try to maintain a balanced life.  I hear that this latest episode, has ear markings of the Diana death. Rightly so, I would say.

Sunday, September 16, 2012


You see it on every street corner, and wonder why they can't seem to invest in a simply set of maternity clothes  because of their appearances?  When I was young it was the only thing to do.  You needed to be appropriate when you went out in public in your condition.  In other words the generation of today do totally the opposite.  I guess they've become more liberal with their thinking, than when I had babies.

Lazy Cat

 Well here she lies, and it's drizzling out so, she's inside making the most of the cool wet weather.  I can't understand why she would want to be in the house?  The birds dive bomb her, it's cool and rainy and her food is in here.  I have to feed her in here because the renegade cats of the neighborhood take it away from her. Mind you she gets into several scuffles over her yard, but they finally wear her down and take her food.  On in particular, whom the neighbor's have named "Tiger" because of his gray tiger stripes, is a frequent visitor, looking for any morsel left by her.

PA Camera

 You can imagine the easy way you can find things for your wedding.  There are wedding planner's who  employ photographers, caterers, florists and other resources.  In this particular state you also have the  philadelphia wedding photography  professionals who make your memories special.  Getting information is as easy as a click on the link in this post.

Saturday, September 15, 2012


I have work to do, and it's almost like I have to ram a cattle prod up my ass to get me moving.  I've gotten so damn lazy lately, it's not real.  I just can't seem to get my lazy butt moving in the right directions, anymore.  I've spoiled myself so badly I can't get motivated.  Procrastination, in my middle name and it has become a byword as well.  I'll do it later, seems to be the only thing I can manage of  late.


There's a spot that you just can't clean on your carpet.  You have some left over carpet from when you installed new.  So, you would like to repair the place where the stain is.  You can get a  carpet cutter  cut out the bad place and take a swath of new carpet, place it in the same hole. The carpet installers would have done the same thing, but now you accomplished something on your own.

That Face

Is it just me or is there other people out there who cringe each time that certain face hits the viewing screen?  I'm so tired of his face being flashed across my TV every time I turn it on.  Now, each time I access a certain website, there he is on the sidebar smiling back at me.  If Obama wanted his face all over the news media and the world he should have been a movie star.  It's for certain he would have been making big money and got his name in lights.  If this man gets re-elected, I am one person who can't wait for the next 4 years to be over with.  Then we can look at someone else's face on our TV screens.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Post Turtle

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75 year old Oklahoma rancher, whose hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.
Eventually the topic got around to Barack Obama and his bid to be our President.
The old rancher said,'Well, ya know, Obama is a 'post turtle'.'
Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a 'post turtle' was.
The old rancher said, 'When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a 'post turtle'.'
The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain.
'You know he didn't get up there by himself, he doesn't belong up there, he doesn't know what to do while he is up there, and you just want to help the dumb ass get down.'

Thursday, September 6, 2012


Thank God, the "Cowboy game" was on last night.  I wasn't interested in seeing Clinton, get up there and gravel in front of the DNC and Obama.  You could tell that the DNC and Obama had set up a plan to get him in the place where endorsement was the only way.  I feel sorry and disgust for his endeavor in trying to get the American people to believe that he believed what he was saying.  You can only remember when Ms. Clinton was an opponent against Obama.  Now, after all this time they have finally put him in their grip and swaying him to endorse the wrong person.  Actually, I wonder if there is a right person, considering the other front runner?  It's too bad that Ms. Clinton didn't over step things and run.  At least that would have given us more to choose from.